Birthday Dos and Don'ts

In my old age, I would like to impart some wisdom to all those younger than me. On your birthday:

DO: Celebrate your birthday with good friends.
DON'T: Let those friends buy you enough drinks to start your own bar.

DO: Use both hands, one to hold your purse, one to hold your vodka soda.
DON'T: Use both hands, one to hold your vodka soda, one to hold your other vodka soda.

DO: Drink fun cocktails.
DON'T: Drink things that have "scorpion", "kamikaze" or "zombie" in their names.

DO: When coming across others also celebrating their birthday, wish them a good one and be on your way.
DON'T: Fist pound them because they share a Zodiac sign with you and then agree to pose ridiculously for numerous photos.

DO: Tell amusing stories to your friends.
DON'T: Tell the same story, which grows less and less amusing with each telling, 10 times in a row to your friends.

DO: Hydrate with water throughout the night.
DON'T: Spill your water all over your friend's shirt.

DO: Have a late night snack.
DON'T: Automatically eat whatever is put in front of your face. Washing down a taco with a hot dog (or vice versa) does not a happy tummy make.

DO: Party like a rock star!
DON'T: Regret it the next day. Blame the alcohol (or someone else) instead.

Autumn in New York

Living in California, sometimes it's easy to forget that there are seasons.

But during a recent trip to New York, I took a nice Sunday morning stroll through Central Park and was surrounded by shades of maize, thistle and burnt sienna (thank you, Crayola!). A light breeze, the crisp autumn air, the crunch of fallen leaves below my feet...it was so gorgeous that it almost made me forget the fact that later that day I had to wait over an hour on Central Park South to eat brunch, subsequently got back to my hotel late, waited 20 minutes for the hotel to bring down my suitcase and another 25 minutes for them to hail me a cab, got stuck in traffic and arrived at the airport late, couldn't pay by credit card because the cabbie's machine was broken so my cash-less butt had to run inside to the ATM to get cash and run back out, didn't feel like sprinting to the gate so went standby on a flight 2 hours after my original one, got the last seat on the plane (middle, of course) , couldn't find overhead bin space for my suitcase but was told by the airline guy that my suitcase fit upfront in the crew closet so I sat back down only to later find that he checked in my suitcase without telling me or anyone for that matter, landed in LAX without any luggage claim check where of course my suitcase did not show up at baggage claim, went to the lost baggage counter where they informed me they couldn't help me because I didn't have said claim check because again the guy in NY never told me he checked in my suitcase, and finally got home at midnight with no toiletries. Almost.